1> bewildered; puzzled
2> complicated; involved; entangled.
Perplexed! There are many things that leave me perplexed. How does gravity work? What’s in the centre of the earth? What is a black hole? How does my brain function? How is each snowflake, fingerprint, leaf different? Did dinosaurs really exist or not? Do aliens exist?
But to me the most perplexing thing of all are relationships. Of husband and wife, parents and children, siblings, friends etc. How do we all fit together? What makes some of us click and some blast? Why are relationships so involved and bewildering? What you say, what you do, what you think…all of it makes a difference. Husbands don’t understand wives and parents don’t understand children. Siblings don’t understand each other, they are always competing for their parents attention or material benefits. Parents are trying to teach children boundaries and values and morality. But they may not always be perfect in these same teachings. We tell our children that lying is bad, yet we tell lies ourselves. We call them ‘white lies’, harmless lies, lies of omission, etc. But a lie is a lie. It can’t be qualified. And it is confusing to those children we are teaching, that lying is wrong!
Relationships are confusing, involved and unnecessarily bewildering. There are rules for everything and everyone. Rules for husbands, wives, children, friends, acquaintances, neighbours etc. What is acceptable behavior and whats not. What to say, what to do…rules, rules everywhere.
The only relationship that is truly simple and uncomplicated is my relationship with Christ. His rules are simple. Love the Lord above all else and love your neighbour as yourself. Once you follow Him and these simple rules, all other relationships become less complicated. If husbands love their wives like themselves, they won’t cheat on them, beat them, ill treat them either physically or emotionally. Same for wives, if they love their husbands like themselves, they wouldn’t deny the husband his due, they too wouldn’t cheat. They wouldn’t lie to each other or their children. When children see their parents behave well, treating each other with respect and love and consideration, they will try to emulate the parents. The children will treat the parents with respect and honour. Peace will reign in the home. When these peaceful people go out, they will interact with all those they meet in a peaceful way. Anger and provocation will not follow their words and deeds. In this way all our relationships will be affected with the peace of Christ. And the presence of Christ, the God of light, will illuminate the darkness and disperse the confusion of complicated and entangled relationships.
At least that’s the ideal world I’d like to live in. But I know life is not always so cut and dried. We are only human and we are ruled by our weaknesses. Sometimes, when provoked, we get angry and even abuse and curse. We lose our peace. But the trick is to realise the weakness in ourselves, deal with it and overcome it. We will fall from time to time. But we must get up, dust ourselves off and continue trying. Someday, I will achieve that ideal! Till then I’ll just keep trying And whenever I get perplexed, I’ll look up to the Lord of Light and ask for His illumination to disperse the darkness and confusion.